A MEMO FROM SALTED SAM, * Our Poet's April Poem


                                A MEMO FROM SALTED SAM, *
                                   Or, Knock Off the KNO3

  "Yet the truth is, there's no additional levels of saltpeter hidden in Army [or Navy, Ed.] chow. There's also no proof potassium nitrate (saltpeter) has any effect on libido, plus or minus, so there would be nothing to be gained  from such a doctoring of edibles. Yes, saltpeter has long rumored to be an anaphrodisiac, a substance that reduces sexual drive. But it's all rumor and no fact."  -- Snopes Notes

                                     Po-tas-si-um Nitrate!
                                    'Twas breakin' me down!
                                    Girls gave me the finger,
                                    All over that ol' Crabtown.
                                    They served it with sugar,
                                    They mixed in salt,
                                    I wasn't worth nothin',
                                    'Twas ol' Saltpeter's fault!
                                    The corpsmen in Sickbay
                                    Said it just wasn't true,
                                    But when I started drinkin' wardroom coffee
                                    I couldn't doodly-doo!
                                    O four-stripe Commandant
                                    Please make them desist,
                                    Put Potassium Nitrate
                                    At the top of your s***hole list!
                                    O Bo-dee O Do,
                                    O Bo-dee O Do,
                                    And Bibbity Bobbity Boo, Yah!

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